I was walking around the neighborhood in a state of bliss. Typically, I tend to spend five out of every six minutes of my advanced dog life thinking about the pain in my four knees, but now the only thing I could think of was my newly found freedom. Some dogs may tell you it can be dangerous on the “outside,” but I have been observing these humans for years. They live to serve us dogs, and will sometimes fight over who gets to pet me or feed me a treat.
The colors (the ones I could see) whirled past me, and I came up to a flower garden. It was one of the best ones. Lots of tasty flowers, and nice soft dirt you do not even have to dig very head hard to sink your paws into! Maybe I got a little carried away, because before I realized it, my legs were more than halfway deep into the rich black dirt! That’s when I heard it…
A blood curdling scream came from what sounded like a human woman. I shot up to investigate what had happened to her, thinking perhaps I could lend my Canine aid to her predicament. When I finally spotted her on her front porch, wearing only a pink robe and those curious rollers in her mane (the females of the species seems to think these “curlers” are quite fashionable), she was in no danger whatsoever! I noticed that her glare was focused on me. Perhaps I had pre-empted her own intentions to take advantage of the flower garden, to feel the rich soil between her paws. With all due respect, she clearly lived adjacent to the garden and had access to it at any time she wanted.
She then started talking to the little brick in her hand, calling it “Dog Catcher” in a very aggressive tone. I simply walked away, because she was obviously disturbed. That was my mistake, and now I’m sitting here in jail.
My time’s up again…I am still formulating my escape from “Pound.”